Me at Waterpolo, they have a marvelous tuckshop |
Everything quietened down when He left for school, but it did not take long for Storm to decide that I was far too comfortable in my basket. Her latest childish and very irritating trick is to get hold of my collar and tug. Sleep was now impossible and I shuffled off to see what was in the breakfast bowl. Good thing for Storm that she was not brought up on the same street in that Stellenbosch township that I was. She would have been taken out permanently before her first birthday.
I always enjoy the morning walk round the Campus with Her as we meet so many of the other 365 dogs. The 365 Club was something He started when He first became Headmaster of Wynberg – neighbours could walk round the campus with their dogs for 365 days a year provided that they paid R365 annually. I constantly hear Him say that it must be the only club in South Africa which hasn’t raised its subscriptions fees for 15 years.
Storm. No-one asked me if I wanted a sibling. What were He and She thinking? |
The way Storm simpers like a tart round Boris is pathetic. No taste.
By the time we are finishing our morning perambulation around the Campus, it is normally close to first break. I really do feel that I have to play my part in keeping the campus clean (noblesse oblige?) so I consider it my duty to pick up those crusts and sandwiches discarded by so many thoughtless schoolboys. Occasionally, I have to give them a reminder bark that I am on duty.
After break, I do like to pop into the Headmaster’s office to see how He is doing. On this particular Friday, I did notice that Dylan was once again on the bench outside the office. I wonder what he has done this time – even I am not in the dog box as often as he is.
Anyway, I have a far more important assignation in mind. Morning milk. ‘Sandy, you are late this morning,’ admonishes Glenda, His secretary, as she warms up the milk in the microwave. I don’t get attention like this at home – and she seems to know exactly the right temperature for the milk.
Feed Me |
He can talk such nonsense with a straight face. They weren’t to know that it was only a tape recorder in my collar – but in any event, they were dead quiet while He was out.
Reflecting on my status as Head Dog, hang on? Was that the lunch bell? |
I decided against it. I still have memories of the last time I tried that one. I thought on that occasion that my presence on the couch was acceptable – especially as the secretaries did not seem to mind. Mary even said I looked cute with my head on the arm of the sofa. Never mind about how I looked, it was extremely comfortable.
Well, you won’t believe the ructions when He came out of his office and saw me on the sofa. I thought that corporal punishment went out years ago in schools! The indignity of it – what with me being Head Dog and all. I wish I knew a good lawyer. That would teach Him. I would love to see Him answer a charge of ‘grievous bodily harm’ in court.
It's been a hard day's night and I've been working like a dog |
Quite so. Now they know. I hope the audience realise that they are singing about me.
It was difficult to sleep in the corridor on that Friday morning. There was clearly something happening because folk were rushing back and forth and guests were arriving. I eventually picked up that it was the Prefect Inauguration. The Rousseau’s were so keen not to miss it that they arrived at 11.15 for a 13.30 start.
I met some chap called Sakhi Gqeba, who was scheduled to make a speech at the Ceremony. As he sat in His office, many teachers came through to greet him. It turned out he was Head Prefect of the school in 2000 – but that was well before my time. He was also greeted very fondly by Her, when she arrived just before the ceremony. So he must have been a very good Head Prefect.
Then disaster struck. I was summoned into the office and firmly told to stay put and the doors were shut. I could not believe it. He knew how much I love ceremonies and meeting people. Well, I soon got my own back. I jumped up onto His leather couch and curled up on the cushions.
I love the stage, one has such a good view of People from here |
The hall was packed so I took the direct route down the centre isle – and, after a short exploratory trip round the front of the hall, I saw Him on stage. I heard later that it was a good thing that I did not see his face. I can’t understand why.
Mark Timlin, as outgoing Head Prefect, was calling every prefect up in turn and they were being presented with their blazers. I felt that they needed my involvement – as Head Dog my place was on stage with my team. As I was going up the steps to the stage, I glanced at the audience. They clearly approved of my presence because all I saw was smiles. Encouraged by this, I sat down at the feet of Him. I was not even given the option of turning over and lying on my back, because He then jumped up and – horror of horror – dragged me by the collar in a most undignified way to the back of the stage. At the height of this indignity, I was greatly mollified to hear a collective sympathetic ‘ahh…’ come from the audience. However, it did little to alleviate my embarrassment. As Head Dog, after such treatment, how would I be able to face those hoi polloi braks of the 365 Club?
I bet the Queen would never treat her corgis like that. And I have corgi blood in me too. Come to think of it, the Vet once told Her that I had twenty breeds in me. That wasn’t very nice.
Good grief, these people are forever photo bombing me ... |
One of the teachers made me sit with him in the front row of the audience. I was thus able to enjoy the proceedings from there. Quite frankly, all I wanted from the very beginning was an opportunity to be part of it all. I thoroughly enjoyed the speech from the incoming Head Prefect, Raythaan Addinall. ‘Let us break down hierarchies,’ he said. ‘We are one brotherhood!’
I wonder if this applies to Head Dogs being dragged ignominiously off the stage.
I enjoyed the tea afterwards in the Fish Bowl. Quite a number of titbits from sympathisers came my way. I even managed to wangle my way into a few photos with the prefects and some of the staff. We leaders have to stick together.
No-one ever promised that the life of a Head Dog would be easy.
3 comments:
An absolutely brilliant read!
This is so witty and well written, I felt as though I were there the whole time, especially in the hall.
I sincerely hope that your writing talents will extend to a book of your WBHS Memoirs. I am sure it will be a wonderful success.
Regards
Eric Roberts
(Class of '77)
Fantastic! A dog's life it is indeed! Thanks,Mr Richardson - light relief after an evening of school magazine editing.
My class will enjoy this in the morning.
Steve Anderson
Hudson Park High School
Dear Sandy
I really enjoyed reading your post and hope there will be many more. (Speaking as a dog with a blog myself and a regular walker around your wonderful school.)
love Coco
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