Tuesday 9 October 2012

The Art of Coarser Cricket

'Our Beautiful, Difficult, Summer Game' is how CB Fry, an England Cricket Captain, once described cricket. CB Fry also played in a number of test matches against Wynberg Old Boy, Aubrey Faulkner.

With the winter we have just had in the Cape, it has been hard to imagine sitting on a boundary rope in bright sunshine watching a contest between willow and leather. As the donor this winter season of two umbrellas and a pair of Citrusdal's finest footwear to the good cause of watching Wynberg's rugby and hockey teams take on the elements and opposition teams, I have since then been looking in vain for weeks for signs of spring buds heralding the emergence of white flannels.

Azis Samaai, Chairman of United Cricket Clubs Youth Section, couldn't have put his request to me at a better time. "I know it is late notice," he said to me in my office one day early in September, "but would Wynberg like to enter an u15 team into the Cape Youth Festival during these holidays?"

I accepted with alacrity. Here was a chance for more boys to experience 'proper' cricket rather than the dreary diet of T20 whizz pops. Shaun Hewett, as Master in Charge of Cricket gave a more reasoned response, "I have six coaches away on three tours already," he said. "Who will take the side? Besides the boys may have holiday plans."

I saw my opportunity. "I will take them," I said. "I will put an announcement in assembly asking for all keen u14 and u15 cricketers who are not on tour to volunteer."

Larry Moser was disapproving. "How will you fit this in? You have 158 Matric report comments to write before Wednesday ..."

"No problem," I said waving the Deputy Principal off airily. "I have never missed a deadline yet ..."

There was a large group of cricket-smitten volunteers outside my office after assembly which disproved the theory that boys only want to play bash / wallop cricket. Now a major problem reared its head. How do we choose a side from a large bunch of willing and passionate young cricketers?

Kyle Williamson and Rodney Inglis volunteered to help me coach the team. Feeling rather like an executioners, we eventually whittled the names down to 13 - which became 14 when one boy refused to take no for an answer.

Then the practices began. First practice was on the tennis courts to practice stroke play (because it was raining); the next one was in a classroom to discuss field placings because it was raining); another one was on the artificial pitch (because it was raining). In between rain, we even managed to have some sessions in the nets. Now I await the time when these boys become captains of industry in future years and, knowing Wynberg's need for indoor coaching facilities, will donate copiously and generously to this project ...

On the Monday (a public holiday) before the festival began, we had a middle practice. 'Only at Wynberg,' complained Mrs Philp. 'I had to drive in this morning from Fish Hoek at 6.00am to deliver one son for his Grade 10 Camp and then drive back another 30 kilometres at 3.00 pm to bring the other one to cricket! This is meant to be my day off!'

Jared couldn't understand what his mother's problem was. Neither could I. This was, after all, in the fine cause of CB Fry's beautiful summer game!

The first day of the festival arrived with the players dutifully arriving 45 minutes before the game against Bergvliet ... to drizzle. A late start, then on we went to do battle in a 40 over game. We won the toss and opted to bowl first. Before every game, in order to forestall any unhappiness from three boys having to sit out, we cleared with the opposing coach that we could field and bowl 14 players.

After five overs, I was looking to the skies wondering where the rain was when we wanted it.  Bergvliet had gleefully clubbed 51 runs and were going like steam trains - eventually to close their innings at an impressive 243 / 7. Admittedly we did give them 7 extra overs and 41 runs by bowling 31 wides and 10 no balls. Maybe Larry Moser was right - I should have prioritised the Matric reports. Cricketers whom I have coached in the past, will knowingly predict how the lunch-time team discussion went ... It certainly did not follow the recommendations of Gary Kirsten and Paddy Upton who, in a talk I attended recently, advised coaches always to concentrate on the strengths and the positives which can be taken out of a game.

All well and good for them - but I bet that they never had one of their teams bowl 31 wides ...

Chris Merrington, the WBHS social media editor, rang during the lunch break to find out how it was going. "We will struggle to win this one," I gloomily predicted with the experience of years of coaching behind me.

Within half an hour Facebook was blaring out the news: 'Richardson's Invitation X1 sinking fast ...'

Fortunately my cricket teams over the years have traditionally never listened to me. Aidan hit 92 and then was run out attempting an impossible run. Pity - it would have been his first century ever. Justin contributed a stylish 51 and Dylan 37* and we passed the Bergvliet score with an over to spare and four wickets in hand.

After the match, we handed out the kit - a festival shirt and pullover. Paul, one of the smaller boys in the team received a large in both items. He was not happy. "How can I wear these?" he complained with the pullover nearly down to his knees.

"You're lucky," I said. "When the others outgrow their kit by next year, you will look good in yours ..."

That seemed to do the trick and he happily kept wicket for the festival - fortunately not tripping over anything.

The following day was against United on the Jacques Kallis Oval. "Now you all have to know the conditions under which Jacques gave his name to this Oval," I told them with due seriousness. "It was that no Wynberg cricketer will EVER throw his wicket away on this field ..."

"Wow," said Tim. "Now I am nervous ..."

Fortunately, United did not know these JK Oval rules and with Jared breaking through with three early wickets, United were all out for 107. One red-shirted spectator did his best to help their cause. "WIDE, Mr Umpire!" he shouted at me when the ball went down the leg side - unfortunately not seeing it clip the pads of the batsman on the way passed.

Proving that the view from the bank is not always better, he tried again later. A lusty blow stopped about a metre from the boundary. "FOUR!" he demanded - no doubt hoping that would encourage the ball to continue rolling.

The next over saw the same batsman launch into one of Phillip's leg spinners and dispatch it over the Oval Pavilion. It was a huge blow and dented Phillip's ego no end. "What did I do wrong?" he asked me disconsolately afterwards. I laughed (through gritted teeth), "Nothing! Just enjoy a great shot."

Having learnt from Mr Red Shirt, the United players kept up a steady stream of comments when they came on to field. "Don't worry about him," the cover shouted to no-one in particular about Matthew who was opening the batting. "He is just swinging like a rusty door in the wind."

The rusty door had the last laugh, as remembering Kallis' injunction, Matthew batted for over an hour for a well constructed 21. He eventually nicked one but was given not out by the United umpire. "THAT WAS OUT!" announced Mr Red Shirt from the bank. Matthew agreed and walked. Eleven United players ran over to him and shook him by the hand for his sportsmanship.

Our Captain, Shu-aib, also took flak. "You must be a vegetarian," he was told. "Your bat has no meat!" That comment was lost on Shu-aib. Ignoring all the advice from the fielders, we went on to win by six wickets.

Day Three saw Bergvliet convincingly turn the tables on us in a T20 encounter and then it was off to play Pinelands on the last day.

We won the toss, opted to bat and played well to get to 170 /4. Three run-outs later and we were 183 all out. Two of the run-outs were plain suicidal. The third was straight out of 'The Art of Coarse Cricket'.

Following instructions, Liam asked the umpire how many balls left so that he could check that they were up to the run rate for that over. "One to come," he was told. Unable to penetrate the field, he then hit the last ball straight to a fielder. No run. The fielder threw it in, hit the stumps and the ricochet rolled past cover. Liam called for the run and ended up standing at Dylan's end. The conversation was priceless.

Liam: "Dylan RUN ... the ball is live."

Dylan: "No, it is not - the umpire said it was last ball of the over."

Liam: "But he hasn't called 'over' yet - so the ball is live. Dylan ... RUN."

Three or four of the Pinelands fielders then wandered over to join in the chat. "It is dead because it hit the stumps," said one helpfully.

Liam knew his rules. "No it is not. Dylan ... RUN."

Dylan: "What for? The ball is dead."

In the meantime, the cover fielder sauntered over to the ball and lobbed it into the keeper - who for the sake of something to do, took off the bails and appealed. A surprised Liam did a quick volte-face. "It can't be out, the ball is dead," he announced emphatically denying his argument of the last three minutes.

Kyle Williamson was unmoved. "Out!" he said - and Liam had to go - understandably with very bad grace. The heated discussion between Dylan and Liam continued right through lunch break ...

The Pinelands innings was a nail-biter. They lost wickets but kept going. Suddenly 183 seemed a small total. With 20 runs to go and five Pinelands wickets in hand, we looked dead and buried. Kyle Williamson was pacing up and down.

"I have never been so nervous even when playing in a cricket game," he said.

"Good grief, Kyle, it is only a game," I said, gripping the sides of my camp chair. The last man came in with 9 runs to go. 4 off the edge to third man. 2 through covers - a misfield caused by the tension. My knuckles were whitening as they now gripped the camp chair with intensity.

Then Anele put us all out of our misery by bowling the last man neck and crop. We had won by two runs. Anele's first wicket of the festival was his most vital. Roy of the Rovers would have been proud of the subsequent scenes. No humility in victory here as players lifted one another aloft in delight.

It was a great four days. I am sure that no Wynberg player has heard of CB Fry - but they would certainly  understand his sentiments - it IS a beautiful Summer Game and no doubt these four days helped them understand how difficult cricket really is.

To cap it all, I met my deadline for the Matric report comments.

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